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China’s Millennials Shun Traditional Matchmaking, Wait to Find Love
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The Reinvention of Matchmakers; Ethnography of a Marriage Agency in Urban China Whereas traditional matchmakers were an indispensable part of any.
BEIJING — You are a young Chinese man whose father tells you the most important skill his future daughter-in-law must have is caring for her home and family. Your mother rejects a year-old woman as your potential mate because she may be too old to bear children. A Weibo page for the show has been visited million times, and the first three episodes had more than million views online. Dating shows are not new in China.
Although arranged marriages were discouraged after the fall of the last imperial dynasty in and banned by the Republican government in the s, Chinese millennials, often portrayed as the excessively indulged and protected products of the one-child family policy, now find themselves yielding to parents who are ready to provide them with everything, even a spouse.
Zhang Tianshu, a year-old woman from Shenyang who appeared on the show in January, said none of her previous boyfriends had satisfied her mother. Zhang said in an interview. Fortunately, she found someone she liked on the show, and her parents liked him, too. The basic structure lines up several young men or women against five sets of parents.
Ghost marriages: A 3,000-year-old tradition of wedding the dead is still thriving in rural China
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Yue Lao — The god of Matchmaking. Chinese people believe that there is a matchmaker god called Yuelao, who is in charge of people’s.
So the year-old Shanghai export sales executive went to a matchmaking firm, one of thousands that have sprung up to help young Chinese, busy with work and trying to please fussy parents, find their better half in the face of a gender imbalance. In traditional Chinese society, marriages were arranged by families and matchmakers and tying the knot was never in question. Although customs are changing rapidly, the one-child policy in modern China piles on even more pressure on children to get on with the business of producing offspring.
Matchmaking events are increasingly common, with eager singles – often accompanied by concerned parents – gathering in parks on the weekends to search for love among personal information strung up on trees and notice boards. Matchmaking companies have stepped in, riding the wave of popularity of such shows and traditional Chinese parental pressure, to cash in on the marrying business. Ouyang, who began her business as a dating website, now holds dating workshops for singles and provides one-on-one tutoring in the finer points of romance for members, who pay from a few thousand yuan to tens of thousands of yuan hundreds to thousands of U.
In addition, her firm holds outings for singles and runs customized courses to help members understand themselves better, as well as building their social and dating skills. Most of her members are white-collar workers in their late 20s or early 30s, who were unable to find love in their limited work and social circles. And despite there being more men than women in China, generally the odds favor the men at any event. Census data shows a rise in the percentage of older single women over the last decade, while the percentage of older single men has fallen, according to the China Daily – which experts said might be due to increasingly choosy women unwilling to settle for men with inferior education and living standards.
Review: ‘Indian Matchmaking’ balances tradition and modernity, despite controversy
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Marriage matchmaking has always been an important cultural practice in China. For generations, marriage was arranged by parents who.
Over the holiday, single men and women across the country would be returning home to visit relatives—only to find themselves interrogated relentlessly about marriage prospects. For some, the pressure would be unbearable. Gong was in office attire: glasses, ponytail, no makeup, and a pink Adidas jacket with a ragged left cuff. The young men and women before her were joining a staff of nearly five hundred. For one thing, the top ranks of Chinese technology are dominated by men. She was five feet three, with narrow shoulders, and when she talked about her business I got the feeling that she was talking about herself.
Our membership has a very clear goal: to get married. For years, village matchmakers and parents, factory bosses and Communist cadres efficiently paired off young people with minimum participation from the bride and groom.
The Price of Marriage in China
A mother in Nanning, South China’s Guangxi Zhuang Autonomous Region, browses information on women, one of whom she hopes will be her son’s future wife. Photo: CFP. A matchmaker center in Jiaxing, East China’s Zhejiang Province, writes down information from parents seeking a spouse for their children in April Govt launches training for rural matchmakers in bid to curb surging bride prices.
For the first time, Cai had doubts about the work she had been doing as a matchmaker in the village over the past 15 years.
Zhou said the weekly show evoked China’s tradition of arranged marriages, in which family elders hired matchmakers to find spouses for their.
Along with the history of more than years, Chinese wedding has become one of the quintessence in Chinese traditions and been adopted more contemporary features over the generations. China is a vast country with many ethnic groups, that the wedding customs and rituals diverse from regions to regions is such an imaginable thing.
However, they still have common celebrating customs. In feudal society, it was their parents who arranged marriages for their children and weddings were often forced to be celebrated. Every aspect would be put on the scale of that time such as wealth, educations, zodiacs, and social status, etc. In this society, the matchmaker who helped to set a marriage between two families played a key role as the third party.
They were the bridge for two families to conduct a poll about the marriage. Over the generations, the majority of Chinese couples today get married for love. They find their match or introduced by their families and relatives. In ancient China, many young girls and boys at the age of getting married went to Yuelao Temple to pray for a considerable match.
Dating in chinese culture
But her eyes kept moving. They tracked the clusters of young women zigzagging from Zara to Calvin Klein Jeans. They lingered on a face, a gesture, and then moved on, darting across the atrium, searching. For Ms. In Joy City, Ms. Yang gave instructions to her eight-scout team, one of six squads the company was deploying in three cities for one Shanghai millionaire.
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“Double Happiness” for China’s matchmaking firms
Often labelled “bare branches” and “leftover women”, Chinese bachelors and bachelorettes face immense societal pressure to get married and have children, partly because parents play an central role in their children’s spouse selection. But in some parts of China, some parents are even going as far as to perform “ghost marriages” — that is, a marriage for two deceased people to live in the netherworld together, according to the 3,year-old belief.
ABC journalist Bang Xiao, who is from China’s central Henan province, has had first-hand experience with such an arrangement. In , one year after his friend Li Chaolong died of leukaemia in a local hospital in China’s central Henan province, his mother finally found him a bride — Li Xiuying, from the same village, who was hours away from dying of kidney failure, according to Mr Xiao. The bride passed away shortly after, he says, and the two families hugged and wept in the funeral, grieving but celebrating.
The day after, a funeral-turned-wedding was held and the couple — who both passed away at young age and had never met each other while alive — were buried together at Li’s family grave.
There was also the tradition of marriage brokers, presently known as matchmakers. Matchmaking was an important task assigned to elderly ladies who matched.
Nearly half of the country’s million unmarried people are expected to use online dating platforms by as young and independent singles are successfully using apps to find a romantic match. Known as “matching windows and doors”, Chinese parents have played the role of matchmaker for generations, pairing up their children based on personality traits, occupations and socioeconomic class. While these practices still exist, China’s increasingly independent young people are now in favour of a more empowering digital solution.
One such example is Baihe, a dating platform that digitises the more traditional aspects of courtship in China. While other online dating platforms — such as the industry leader Momo — are designed for more casual dating, Baihe provides a platform to find a potential spouse. The personal data supplied by users — including real names, qualifications, occupation, property ownership information and credit scores — is used to find a good romantic match. While these digital matchmaking platforms might have modernised the dating experience for young Chinese people, like generations before them, they still face social expectations to marry and have children.
For most young couples a good match is not simply “love for love’s sake”, but it must also take into account social mobility, physical and mental compatibility and family background. As marriage often follows online courtships, it’s no surprise that several dating platforms have expanded their businesses to include brick-and-mortar wedding ceremony and marriage consulting services.
These platforms and services are successful because they cater specifically to the types of WeChat-worthy wedding celebrations that Chinese couples covet.
Chinese dating shows are changing traditional views on love and marriage
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